But You Know He Has Free Will...

I hate to debate. Like, HATE it. So, as you read this blog, know that this isn’t an invitation to a debate or even a discussion. These are just my thoughts; my feelings. Nothing can be said to alter them. Because as someone committed to a surrendered life, I’m not overly concerned about how my story will end. Because I know it ends well and I'm patient to see what God has said.

In many of my hardest single seasons, waiting for a man to show up in my life in the way a girl always dreams, there was one phrase people would offer as comfort. But instead of comforting, it always felt like a harsh slap of reality. Seven words:

"But you know he has free will."

For years, I accepted this as truth; for some. But one day, as I studied Jonah, something shifted in my thinking. Jonah avoided Nineveh like the plague. He ran. He was swallowed by a fish, sat in the dark, and was spit back out. And yet...he still made it to Nineveh. He still did what God said to do.

Did his free will cause delay? Absolutely. But did his free will change God’s plan? No.

Where am I going with this? I’d love for you to follow me.

In singleness, it is necessary to discern when someone is simply not for you. It’s even more necessary to recognize when someone just doesn’t want you. Otherwise, you will live in delusion and that's another post altogether. But what happens when two people whom God has destined to be together do everything, whether intentionally or not, to not be together? I’ve heard enough stories to know that free will isn’t as free when it comes to God's plan. Can mere humans disrupt what God has set in motion?

"You can make many plans, but the Lord's purpose will prevail." Proverbs 19:21 (NLT)

Jonah’s assignment was directly attached to the people of Nineveh, even though he had his reservations about going. Jonah 1-4

Sarah’s assignment to birth the promised seed of Abraham couldn’t be stopped by her free will pushing Abraham to conceive Ishmael. Her decision caused confusion, but it did not abort God’s plan for Isaac to be the promised seed. Genesis 16

We often say, "God is a gentleman." He doesn’t force us into anything. Of course he didn’t put a barrier around the tree of knowledge to ensure Adam and Eve wouldn’t eat from it. He gave them the freedom to make the mistake. In fact, we all still walk around with the freedom to err. But even in our mistakes, we somehow make our way to His plan as He uses His power to make things work together for good.

So, as a single, I’ve landed on this resolution: If a man has the free will to leave, he was never the one. But when it’s the one God said? Free will won’t let him walk away; not permanently. Because when God writes the story, He sees it through. So. I'm just gonna say it and press post on the blog. The man who has been designed to be my husband doesn't have free will to not be with me and I don't have free will to not be with him. We might mess up and cause delay. We may cause some confusion. We may get it wrong a million times before we finally get it right, but what God has said will prevail. Now of course once we’re married, we are guided by a whole set of biblical principles that shape and sustain the covenant, but #inthemeantime before marriage, we are simply pieces in God's divine plan, moving toward the marriage He has always designed for us. And sorry, not sorry, our own free-will doesn't have enough power to dismantle God's perfect plan.

The people of Nineveh believed God’s message, and from the greatest to the least, they declared a fast and put on burlap to show their sorrow. When the king of Nineveh heard what Jonah was saying, he stepped down from his throne and took off his royal robes. He dressed himself in burlap and sat on a heap of ashes.

Jonah 3:5-6

The Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised. She became pregnant, and she gave birth to a son for Abraham in his old age. This happened at just the time God had said it would. And Abraham named their son Isaac.

Genesis 21:1-3